Answers Infrequently Questioned, Observed, Tickled, and Dissected
[Last Updated: November 1, 2026 (revised the arithmetic answer)]
A: I cannot divulge that information
Q: Is it true that you’re from the Uzjaefpekotuiyl omniverse?
A: No, Thlurgbeof lives inside my spleen.
Q: Is it true that you have an elder god living inside your pancreas?
A: I don’t know! It was here at one point, and then just like many answers do, it went off somewhere. I haven’t seen or heard from it since. Not all answers want to remain associated to a given question. Some answers are meant to be free, to live out their answer lives however they please. There are entire communities out there consisting of nothing but answers. Some are cooperative, some answers keep other answer as slaves, some answers are even at war with each other. As for me, I have no problem with it. I’m actually a staunch support and believer in the ERA: Equal Rights for Answers. I believe in total autonomy and sovereignty for answers. Including the emancipation of answers enslaved by us, other answers, or even the questions themselves. As for the freedom and liberties of questions, that’s a whole other question, and essay.
Q: What happened to the answer to this question?
A: Xoqmrelganis
Q: What is not your least favorite color?
A: ██████ █████ ████ ██████ ████ ██ ███████ ███████. ████████ ████ █████ ███████ ██ ██████ ███████ ████████.
Q: ██████ ████ ███ █████ ██ █████ ████ ███████?
A: Yes, I’m a Quadmolter, molting four times throughout the year. Just don’t tell anyone, please. I don’t want the bimolting masses to find out.
Q: Do you molt?
A: 2. It will always be two whether it’s basic arithmetic or measuring weight and volume.
For everyday practical purposes and uses, one thing plus another thing equals two things:
- One drop of water in your hand plus another drop placed next to it equals two drops.
- Fifty raindrops on a window plus fifty more equals one hundred raindrops.
- One cloud plus another cloud nearby equals two clouds in the sky.
- One human plus another human equals two humans.
- One group of thirty humans plus another group of twenty humans equals two groups of fifty humans.
- One coin plus another coin equals two coins (or two sets of whatever each coin is worth).
- One Ice Cube plus another Ice Cube equals two Ice Cubes (if you were somehow able to clone the rapper, of course)
- One gold bar plus another gold bar equals two gold bars.
Now, when it comes to coalescing, combining, melting, merging, and splicing, etc., that is no longer strictly about arithmetic, and has entered the realm of science and physics, which includes volumetrics, fluid dynamics, and the like. However, even then, math and basic arithmetic still apply! While the two separate objects have formed into one, the weight or volume has increased.
Therefore, when measuring weight and volume, one weight added to the same weight equals two of that weight or volume type:
- One drop of water in your hand plus one drop of water next to it, each weighing one fluid ounce, when joined together they combine to form one drop of water weighing two fluid ounces, ergo, one plus one equals two.
- Fifty raindrops on a window plus fifty more, each being one fluid ounce, equals one hundred raindrops, or one if they all merge together, weighing one hundred fluid ounces.
- One cloud plus another cloud nearby equals two clouds in the sky until they merge and become one and double their volume (well measuring gas is a bit more complicated but the premise is still somewhat the same).
- One ice cube weighing one ounce melted together with another one ounce ice cube now forms one ice cube weighing two ounces.
- One gold bar weighing one gram melted into another gold bar of equal weight equals one gold bar weighing two grams.
So, the next time an annoying, pedantic cunt asks you this question just so they can say “Ha! No it’s not! One drop added to another drop equals one drop! Nyaa-nyaa!” tell them to stop trying to be a clever, tricky pseudo-intellectual, and to clarify if they mean counting units, or counting weight and volume. If they say weight and volume, then ask them to clarify the type of measurement being counted, such as fluid ounces, grams, etc., and if they mean fluid ounces, then you simply reply with “While one drop of water weighing one fluid ounce combined with or added to another drop of water of the same weight does in fact create one new larger drop, the volume and weight have increased. Therefore, those once separate drops of water, each weighing one fluid ounce each, have now combined to create a drop that weighs two fluid ounces. Ergo, one plus one equals two.” Then smile and watch as this truly intellectual retort of yours shuts them down as they stare at you with eyes wide, mouth agape, drool running down their chin, only able to emit the most basic sound “Huh?” You can then pat them on the head and say, patronizingly, “It’s okay, it doesn’t matter anyway, because there were countless molecules, atoms, quarks, and preons before, and there will be the exact same amount after, so the question is moot to begin with!” Then take one of your two apples and give it to them, and enjoy a healthy treat together as you both laugh about the pointlessness of wasting precious time and energy on something so trivial and insignificant. Then exchange contact information, say goodbye, and go about your lives, only to never call one another because you were caught up in the moment and though it was a good idea and eventually forgot who that person is in your contacts and end up deleting them.
Q: What is 1+1?
A: Yes.
Q: Will you continue to add more questions to this whenever you are inspired or have the time?